Its a hard knock life!

Saturday, June 04, 2005

Baby got back...Boy got rod!

In the whirlwind of a bad break up and other such related incidents a certain young lady (namely moi) had lost sight of what was really important, besides my looks of course! I am referring to the habitual unforeseen hilarity of life! It was only a scant moment ago that a certain confrontation by a cold metal rod and some all too friendly neighbors reminded me of the utter delicacy and sheer comedy, which seems to follow me on this expedition of existence as a ‘twenty something’.

Let me embark on the verbal rebirth of these proceedings, travel with me as we sojourn through the events surrounding…. the ASS of Coral, yes I said ass. Apparently mine gets me noticed…far to frequently then one would desire, and this notice is usually for erroneous reasons. It has become an issue of great concern. It all began the other day at work, allow me to reminisce, I deal with a lot of interesting people in my line of work, even I furnish the impression of normality in relation. At the moment of ‘impact’ I was helping a certain chap, it appeared he was going camping. My job is to permit his transition of shopping to camping to be as swift and smooth as possible. As I turn my back to him and proceed to extract his change from the register, I find myself in a very compromising position. I feel my face flush, my knees weaken, my body starting to feel strangely jittery, and I feel something brush my inner thigh. As I try to turn around and face the gentleman to give him his change, I realize that I cannot. First, I am, as I said feeling very unsettled, Second, I have recently come to realize how this ‘compromising’ position has been attained. The man had ostensibly projected his fishing rod into my inner thigh, and upon suggested retrieval it became lodged between my legs and proceeded in an upward motion, to the peak of no return, there I was, standing my back to the customer, a fishing rod stuck between my legs, and sure enough, lodged in an all to fragile region. One must be VERY creative to not only regain their composure, as they have to face the costumer, they must also reach for emergency survival 101, how to unlodge a fishing rod from your ass in a timely and discrete fashion, as not to do any damage to your delicates, whilst trying to not expire of sheer embracement, oh the horror. The kind man apologized for getting ‘fresh’ and gingerly went on his way. I was curious to know what kinda things i could catch if i bought a rod.

9 Comments:

At 7:01 PM, Blogger Briananthony said...

wow, catch of the day you are.......i can't believe i just said that. sorry for the delay i forgotten you were a blogger :S

 
At 8:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh Coral, I was laughing so hard! I had to go tell my sister your story! Wow... that was so hilarious! You are so funny... I love the way you tell stories!

Love ya to pieces,
Joya

 
At 11:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are fricken hilarious...granted i am somewhat intoxicated at the moment...never the less..fricken funny...i don tknow what i would have done...as if that wasnt somewhat hot....

 
At 12:37 AM, Blogger Joshua Elijah Drake (Wang TianCi) said...

I don't get it? what happened? ;)

 
At 4:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

so what your saying is....there was a guy who stuck a fishing rod in your ass? k, so where is the part of the story when you kick his ass coral? Honestly do you think it was a mistake?? Lord knows, as do you that your ass is one to reckon with....and for a "mistake" like that to happen, that guy was a sicky. "Merv the Perv", or "Chester the Molestor" if you will.

 
At 4:51 PM, Blogger Coral said...

What can i say haha...i cant help the fact im delish!

 
At 10:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

so let me get this straight....you had a fishing rod....shoved into your butt-hole....and you were EMBARASSED? I don't get it....if i know you well..and im sure i don't...i would have guessed you would have been elated! I remember when I stuck a fishing rod in your butt the first time we met, and that's how we became such great friends. OH WAIT...that was a different Coral....my fault....

your "anal" pal
Marshal

 
At 10:18 PM, Blogger Coral said...

ummm...marshal who? Apparently youre unaware of the tat i have it says EXIT ONLY haha...ewwww

 
At 12:12 AM, Blogger brian g said...

coral, once again, great story. it has a nice hook, just catches you in an uncomfortably awkward position and reels you in.
so when are you going fishing yourself?

 

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