Its a hard knock life!

Saturday, October 07, 2006

A Healthy Wife Starts By Living Single Well

Why are you still single?

Why are you asking such a stupid-ass question?
Ok, so today- as I was going about my business trying to read my email I was visually assaulted by this lava life ad "why are you still single" …it got me thinking,
What is actually so bad about being single? Why shouldn’t I be?
Granted, this is coming from a girl who hasn’t been very single lately but frankly - its my mission to be content, to be 'so good' at being single people wonder why...

The word 'single' has such negative connotations - people look at you as if you are diseased. Have you ever noticed when people ask if you're seeing someone and you say 'no' they look at you in a disapproving way or with the 'aww sweety its ok' look. You know, I'd be ok with it, if all ya'll let me be ok with it.
Even worse- have you ever noticed that those who are married have a higher degree of credibility? Honestly, Its as if the title 'husband' or 'wife' far out-weighs any amount of experience one has had - their age, or their education.

IM SINGLE! For once in my life - I can honestly say confidently that I am single because I want to be, and more likely need to be, not due to lack of options. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to remain single for too long (although length is relative), but I am actually looking forward to it in some kind of weird way.

My sister and I were flipping channels the other day and stumbled onto a soap opera - in this particular scene the husband had been searching for his wife, when he finally finds her, he holds her tight and says "I was worried about you" she asks why, and he replies "I am your husband, my job is to worry about you and make sure you are safe."

Who would have thought the Young and Restless could give me a model of the type of man I want - until I can find a man that smitten with me- I am ok staying single.

One final point - I was dating a man recently who was over the top marriage minded and a part of me thought - I have spent my whole life wanting to be married I have never enjoyed or embarrassed being single, I have merely survived in the shadow of desiring a relationship - I am now in a place where I want to live and thrive in the contentment of being independent, all be it temporary.

So to answer your question lava life 'Why are you still single?' I am single because I can be.
I want to 'live single' so well, that when I finally leave this phase of extreme independence, I will know I lived it to the fullest extent - how devastating would it be to get married and wish I would have enjoyed being single while I had the chance, at that point there is no going back.


At 11:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

who is this girl writing these things, I have never met her! She sounds neat!

At 12:01 AM, Blogger Coral said...

dont mock me sannes

At 5:11 PM, Blogger LBomb said...

It's funny that you have to qualify your post by saying "not because of lack of options". If you were so happy about being single, why do you have to defend yourself?


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